Advice to Students: The Last Round

If you decided to go to university this year, it is probably almost time for you step into your new life of lectures, independence and social groups!

This is the last installment of my Advice to Students series.  In case you have not read the others, I have posted the links below. But for now, please keep reading because the advice I have here is a result of my own personal experience, and I believe I could have performed so much better at university if someone had given me these tips. Trust me, you do NOT want to miss these.For those of you reading in the US, I am referring to what you call "college".

1.At the beginning of the semester, make note of all your coursework deadlines. Put them in your diary, and add in reminders one month, two weeks and one week prior to when they are due. I say this because your lecturer will probably only give you the dates, once, in the first lecture. He/she will not chase, or remind you. But he/she will definitely fail you if you miss the deadline. I studied French and Linguistics at Queen Mary, and made the mistake of not paying attention to the due date of my “Language in the USA” coursework. The result was a rushed piece of work, hastily put together the night before it was due. It attained no more than a C grade. Avoid this mistake, and it will save you so much stress.

2. Find out how your faculty prefers for you to do your referencing and stick to it. Here is a very good guide from the Anglia Ruskin university. 

3. I stayed at home whilst at university as the distance between my house and Queen Mary University was too close for me to qualify for accommodation. If you are in this position, strike a friendship with someone in halls. You will be grateful you did after late nights at Freshers events and the like.  

4. Although I stayed at home for most of my degree, I did study in France in my third year. It was my first time away from home, so I did feel very homesick, and quite miserable, until I forged some good friendships with the other ERASMUS* students.  My experience has taught me the benefits of joining clubs and societies. In my first and second year, I was a part of the ACS and the Christian Union. I met with like minded people and was offered a welcome break to all the studying and administration that comes with starting uni.

Thank you to my cousin J, for posing for me.
Good luck at uni this year!

5. Kind of contrary to my last point, it’s good to socialise but please do not let events,  nights out and group sessions take over your life. Remember in final year, when your grade is calculated, your lecturers are not going to care how many netball games you organised, or bible studies you attended. .

6. Spread out your timetable, and give yourself some room to breathe. In my first semester of my first year Mondays consisted to three two hour lectures, back to back. The result was constant learning from 11 am to 5pm with no break in between. The result was, I was knackered by the end of the day, and sometimes even skipped my last class altogether.

7. If you are taking a class such as literature, or any other class that requires studying out of one book for the entire semester get your own copy – even if it’s second-hand. Your campus library will normally only have a few copies of that particular book. 

8. Don’t lose who you are in the name of diversity. Uni will probably be the first time you will come into contact with so many belief systems, faiths and people. By all means love everybody and be open and non-judgmental, but remember who you are, and stand firm in your faith, your principles and your values. Getting caught up in things you have no business mixing with will only affect your studies.  

9. Make friends with the librarians on your uni campus. Life is so much pleasant when you have someone to offer you waivers and favours in the library. In addition to that, try and join a bigger library outside of your campus, because you may not find everything you’ll need on campus. I had access to other campus libraries of the University of London. I also applied for membership at Senate House Library, which helped me a great deal. 

Good Luck

10. Google Books and Google Scholar will be your friend. Shhh! That’s a bonus tip. I won’t tell you why now but you will come to find out pretty soon. Once you do, please let me know in the comments box below. Also, there is a very popular site that all your lecturers will tell you to NOT to refer to. But I found that scanning its pages briefly before starting a piece of work always gave me a good foundation of knowledge. Just don’t ever cite directly from it, and NEVER include it in your bibliography.

I hope you find these tips useful. Please do share any additional tips you might have below. Also, if you have any more questions about university please do post below or send an email to souljournersstory@gmail.com. 

If you enjoy what you read on this blog, please do show me some love and subscribe by entering your email address in the space bar on the right hand panel. I promise to return the love and send you exclusive posts on deeper and more heart felt issues. 

Read some more advice here and here.

*ERASMUS is an EU student exchange programme. 

Finding Perfect in Your Imperfections

Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous

Psalm 139:14 , NLT

This is a continuation of my last post: It's OK to not be OK. If you have not already read it please do so here.

In the image above is what I would probably refer to as the most physically imperfect part of me. OK, to be real about it, I totally hate it! It bulges out rather than lie flat, and it has received totally unearned, and unwarranted stripes all over it. I hate to think the number of stretchmarks it will have after children. Yet I have decided to subject the whole world to it in order to prove a point. 

As you know by now, the one thing that most of us do is to equate perfection with looking like the models we see on TV or the magazines. We tend to think our lives are substandard if we don't get the grades we want, or have the dream job, or the perfect partner (or any partner at all for that matter!). 

I know that a lot of us have hang up about different aspects of our lives, or that we feel are some how lacking whilst we haven't yet achieved our dreams. You should never stop working towards your goals. Always stay loyal to your craft.  But whilst you are doing that here are my top tips in finding perfect in our imperfections:

1.Find your talent and share it with the world. I used to be envious of people who could sing. I always used to say to myself "if only I could sing". However by focusing on what I couldn't do I was making myself feel inadequate. This was until I started focusing on what I could do. Don't even convince yourself that you are not good at anything.  Because everyone has a talent! You might be a great public speaker.  Or good at solving complex equations,  in which case you can teach. Seeing others become blessed by your gift will lift you.

2. I was watching one of my favorite You Tubers not too long ago, and something she said resonated with me. That you should see your body as an extension of your soul. She used her fat arms, which she had always hated, as an example, pointing out that she no longer saw them as fat and ugly, but as big enough to give others good hugs, and in so doing offering comfort.What are the things about you that you hate, be it your physical attributes or otherwise? Do you feel your shoulders are to broad and unfeminine? Reconsider that the next time a friend needs a shoulder to cry on. 

3.Work with what you got.  Don't spend unnecessary money trying to keep up with the Jonses. The fact that most of my Friends have cars, and keep trying to convince me that I need one too doesn't mean I will just go out and get one. Competing with others will only make you financially and emotionally poor.

4.Embrace change and be flexible. I can't begin to tell you how many times I have placed all my hope, my energy, and my future plans on a job application only to be left disappointed. When these things happen you need to go back to the drawing board. There is no such thing as a dead end. Only bends and turns in the road...unless you refuse to turn, then that will be the end of the road for you. 

5. Be grateful for the present moment. You can practice this by simply saying out loud "Thank you God for my job...my health...my home etc". Gratitude will help you to be more positive. It will also place you in a position to receive more.

6.Get in the habit of giving to others, despite how horrible you think your life is, offer your time, your energy or your money to serving others. Your confidence will be boosted when you see the positive impact you are having on people. For example, I sometimes go through periods of exhaustion and total burnout until a member of my youth group tells me how a particular lesson has impacted their life. 

7. Look for windows of opportunities in the life you are living right now. For example, from 2010 to 2014 I was working shifts, and hated the fact that I was working at crazy hours. However, my job also offered a lot of free time, and the freedom of not being committed to a 9-5 meant I had the opportunity to do my masters. 

From the same vantage point, just shift your focus

8. Get used to the person you see in the mirror sans hair extensions, make up, shape wear, and even clothes. Get to know her. Smile at her. Wave at her. Talk to her.  Get used to her (or him). Let her (or him) become your friend. You are stuck with her (or him) for life.

9. This might be a slight contradiction to my previous point, but when you are not standing in front of the mirror naked, dress to impress. wear clothes that make you feel confident. Ensure you are well groomed. It will always boost your confidence. Others will also take you more seriously. 

10. Realise that no one's life is perfect. My life may look fabulous, but you have no idea of what else comes with the package.